


Stars

by Planetary_Shock



Category: Fall Out Boy, Gay - Fandom, LGBT - Fandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Anxiety, Death, I've been writing this for a while i just forgot to upload it to Ao3, If you want smut, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Mentions of Suicide Attempt, Stars, Suicide Attempt, Trans, anyone who purposefully misgenders him will be blocked, descriptive (personally accurate) account of panic attack, emotional/mental abuse mentions, go and find your own, just wait and see, maybe not, you won't get it here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-02-11 13:26:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 17,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12936231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Planetary_Shock/pseuds/Planetary_Shock
Summary: Pete is running from a broken past towards a hopeful future, while Mikey comes to terms with his, and the two connect like constellations.





	1. Prologue (But actually takes place after the story)

Mikey lay in the damp grass next to Pete, watching the stars in silence, smiling as he named each constellation of shining specks in the inky sky in his head. When his eyes reached the Milky Way, he whispered, so as not to alert anyone of his presence,

"Remember how I got that nickname, Pete?"


	2. Chapter 1

4 MONTHS AGO...  
Mikey swung his bag over his shoulder, grabbing the door handle as the weight of what felt like hundreds of records and books pulled him off balance, and his glasses fell to the ground. As he picked up his glasses and adjusted them so they just about rested on the tip of his nose, he heard a voice yell out from the top of the stairs,

"HEY! MikeyWay! Not leaving without us, are you?" Mikey rolled his eyes.

"Hurry up Gee, Ray's gonna think we fucking died or something!" He heard a small yelp, and a familiar voice cursing. "Oh, hey Frank!" he shouted up the stairs to Gee's boyfriend, who seemed to spend every hour of the day at their house. Mikey kicked the doormat, scuffing his black boots, and nearly falling again. He sniggered as there was a terrible crash and a small 'Oomph,' as Frank came running down the stairs, tripping and falling on his face at the last step.

"For fuck's sake Frankie, get your life together," Gerard called from the top of the wooden stairs before clomping down them as if it were his life's goal to bring down the entire house. Mikey rolled his eyes,

"Finally, now can we please leave the fucking house? Ray probably thinks we got kidnapped or some shit like that."

"Calm your face Mikes, Ray's not an idiot, he knows we're the slowest motherfuckers on the planet. Besides, when have we ever actually been on time?" Gerard smirked. Mikey flipped off both him and a giggling Frank, then opened the door and left the house, stepping into the street under the grey-clouded sky. 

When they reached Ray's house after a 10-minute drive in Gee's questionably stable car, which was driven by Mikey, as usual, the 3 of them walked through the ever-unlocked door.   
The house was quiet, except for the odd shuffles and occasional flashes of scratchy music from upstairs, due to the lack of either of Ray's parents in the house. The three headed through the open plan kitchen/living room, and up the stairs to Ray's room. Ray's head, or rather, the huge curly bush of hair that they could see, was bent over the needle of a broken record player, which he promptly stabbed himself on when Frank slammed open the door with a flourish.

"Rise and shine, Toro, and get that needle out of your goddamned finger," Frank announced loudly, flopping down onto Ray's bed, which looked like it had been made at some point that day, but was now a disheveled mess of dark green bedcovers and plain white pillows. 

"I wouldn't have a needle in my finger if you hadn't come barging in like you own this house in the first place!" Ray retorted, turning away from the record player. Gerard sniggered, and Mikey rolled his eyes for what felt like the 666th time that day. Before he could comment, however, a voice rang out from the next room, which Ray's family had recently turned into a guest room.

"Hey Toro! You never told me you had so many fucking guitar picks!" Frank raised an eyebrow at Gee, who simply shrugged in reply. 

"Ray?" Gerard asked, but Ray was already leaving the messy, merch covered room, followed cautiously by Mikey, who hit his head on the too-short doorframe, as usual, in the exact same place where Ray's far-too-floofy fro got constantly stuck. Ray beckoned for Gee and Frank to follow, and he led the three into the guest room, where a black-skinny-jeans-clad pair of legs was visible from the closet. 

"Hey Wentz, get your emo ass out of the closet," Ray said, earning a snort from Mikey and Frank. The boy stood up, turned around, threw a hand in the air, and proudly exclaimed,

"I am a Gay child!" accentuating his last word with a snap. Ray rolled his eyes, still smiling,

"Guys, this is Pete, the one I told you about, from Band Camp?" Pete quickly began to talk to Frank and Gee, and somehow, the three managed to get into a heated argument about Iron Maiden. While this argument was going on, Mikey was captivated, his eyes tracing the inked swirls and lines that covered Pete's arms. They were entrancing, it was impossible to look away, he found himself trying to memorize each tattooed pattern. 

Mikey was snapped out of his revere by Pete raising an arm to gesture violently at Frank. Taking a deep breath, Mikey walked over to the three, and began to join in the argument, taking Gerard's side, as usual.

"Well, I think they have a fucking sick bass," Pete said, with a snap. Frank and Gee's heads immediately turned to Mikey, who ignored them, fighting the urge to slap them both. 

"Umm, so, do you, umm, play bass?" Mikey asked, keeping a poker face, but fiddling awkwardly with the hem of his shirt. Pete out a hand on his chest dramatically,

"FUCK YES, I've been playing bass since I was, like, 7, it's the best instrument ever!!!" he exclaimed excitedly. Mikey almost smiled, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards.

"Yeah, I've been playing bass for a while, I guess I'm ok at it," he said, shrugging.

"Shut up Mikes, I've heard you playing nearly every fucking day, and night, for that matter, you're amazing," Gee said, punching his brother in the arm. Mikey blushed bright red, and attempted to hide behind his badly-cut hair. Pete reached up a hand to move Mikey's choppy fringe out of his eyes, 

"Dude, we have to play together sometime," he said enthusiastically. Mikey struggled to contain the huge blush welling up inside him, somehow maintaining his trademark poker face as Pete's fingers brushed against his forehead. He shrugged, and half nodded, still fighting the blush. 

"Hey, bass buddies, you wanna get food?" Frank said, punching Mikey in the elbow. Pete snorted and giggled, while Mikey rolled his eyes,

"If you ever call Pete and I 'Bass Buddies' again, I will rip out your cold heart and throw it out of this fucking window." Frank looked over at the window, which had a fly screen, blinds, and was closed.

"Good luck with that, fucker," he said, smiling so the corners of his eyes wrinkled up. Gerard put his arm around Frank's neck, and began to pull him out of the room. Frank scrabbled at Gee's arm with his black-painted fingernails, trying to get free, while laughing the entire time. Pete and Ray were almost choking on laughter, watching the 5' 4 boy struggle in the grasp of the boy 5 inches taller than him, who was slowly dragging the short boy out of the room, fighting back laughter. 

"Come on you idiots, do you want food or not?" Ray said, pushing Gerard's head to the side, and marching past into the kitchen. A $20 bill lay on the countertop, along with a note that read, 

'Get yourselves some pizza- Mom XXX' followed by the number for the local pizza place, Pete reacted a little too enthusiastically, kicking the edge of the countertop island, and drawing blood from his shin, which was visible through the holes in his jeans. 

"I am an injured gay child," he said, and Mikey laughed, his eyes crinkling up. The two looked at each other, and then started laughing again, everyone else except Ray, who was ordering pizza, watching. When they stopped, both Pete and Mikey stared at each other, red faced, while Frank and Gee gave each other a look. Ray turned around to see the situation, 

"The Hell did I miss in 5 minutes?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am perfectly aware that Frank is not 5' 4, the guys' (current) ages are as follows:  
> Gerard: 18  
> Moikeh: 16  
> Fronk: 17  
> Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III: 16  
> -Planetary


	3. Chapter 2

Half an hour later, Frank was laid out on the couch, his head in Gee's lap, a bite of pizza still in his mouth,

"Wait, so you've never seen any of the Star Wars movies?" He said, and Pete shook his head, swallowed his pizza, and said,

"Nah, my friend Andy from my old town's fucking obsessed though, he even went as some cloak-ninja guy with a light up sword or something for Hallowe'en for 3 years in a row." Mikey snorted,

"I think you mean a Jedi, dumbass."

Frank moved position, so his feet rested on Gerard and he was facing Pete. "So, just to clarify, you have not seen any Star Wars movies?" Pete raised an eyebrow,

"No."

"Not one?"

"Nope."

"Absolutely zero. As in never."

"Nuh-uh."

"Did you even have a childhood?"

Pete sniggered, " I apparently didn't have the right one, if your judgement's anything to go by."

"What the fuck Pete?" Mikey said in disbelief, looking up from his book. Pete shrugged,

"I just never really got around to it, I guess." Ray picked Pete's phone up off the ground and threw it at him.

"That. Is. It. All of you call your fucking parents right now, you're staying the night and we're watching all of the real Star Wars movies, none of that prequel shit." There was a cheer, then a thud, as Gerard over enthusiastically stood up to get his phone, forgetting Frank, who had been resting with the bottom half of legs on Gee's lap, and ended up on the floor, hitting his head against the coffee table. Frank stood up, rubbing his head, and flipped off Gerard grouchily.

Ten minutes later, Pete was sat upside-down on the couch, next to Ray, who kept glancing disapprovingly at the short, tattooed boy. Gee was sat on an over-stuffed tartan print armchair, with Frank perched on the arm, twirling the end of his floppy mohawk between his fingers and running the other hand over the buzzed sides of his head. Mikey was sat cross-legged in front of the coffee table, a plate of pizza on his lap, and glasses perched on the tip of his nose. Frank and Ray were discussing the new Green Day album, half-yelling across the room. The opening notes of the Star Wars theme tune began to play, and Mikey whipped around, accidentally hurling a piece of pizza onto Pete's chest as he turned,

"SHUT UP, THE MOVIE'S STARTING!!!" Frank raised an eyebrow at the outburst of the usually quiet boy, but shut up and turned to face the TV screen. Mikey realized what he had done quickly, and Pete began to laugh, choking slightly due to his upside-down position. Mikey's face turned the same shade of red as his brotherâs hair as he scrambled to grab paper towels from the kitchen. Pete shook his head,

"Don't worry about it, hope you don't mind if I eat this?" he said, flipping back so that he was sitting the right way up while holding a slice of pizza the entire time. Mikey shook his head, and Pete took a huge bite of the cheesy, greasy, fat-filled food. "S'good," he said, his voice muffled through the pizza.

Mikey gave an awkward thumbs-up, then retreated to his spot in front of the TV, where he looked up at the huge spaceship descending over the screen, watching avidly until

"Shit,"Ray said, as the TV shut off, along with all the lights and electronics in the house. "No no no no this is not good, this is really not good. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit."

"Toro, chill, the whole street's out," Frank said, letting the curtains fall back into place from where he had been looking through the window. "S'probably those fuckin road works down the street." Ray began to frantically type his mom's phone number into the scratched screen of his phone, but no one picked up.

"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh," he groaned, repeatedly slamming his head into the fridge. Gerard sighed, and put his hand between Ray's fro, which by this point was covering his face, and the cold metal of the fridge.

"Dude, chill. It's perfectly normal to have a fuckin power out," Frank said to the increasingly distressed Ray, who turned around reluctantly, a bruise blossoming on his forehead. Mikey called out to the group before Ray began another rant,

"There's a thunderstorm coming. Weather app says there is, anyway." Frank let out a whoop and threw his hands in the air, smacking Gerard in the face. Mikey and Ray sniggered, but Pete remained silent. It wasn't until a few minutes of random banter that Frank called out,

"Where the fuck did gay bass guy go?" The others looked around the Pete-less room, not saying anything until Mikey spoke up,

"I'll look for him, he'll be somewhere in the house." The others nodded, and grunted in agreement as Mikey began to climb the stairs, while Gerard, Ray, and Frank searched the house for flashlights and candles.

The tall, glasses-wearing boy crept through the house, calling out quietly for Pete, until he heard fast, panicked breathing from the bathroom next to him. Recognizing the sound, and relating to the feeling, Mikey pushed open the door to see Pete hugging his knees, his back against the cabinet, tears streaming down his face, his chest rising and falling rapidly with his breathing. Mikey swore under his breath, and moved quickly over to Pete, taking his hands in his own.

"Pete, I need you to look me in the eyes. You need to breathe with me, ok?" Pete opened his eyes, but kept his head buried into his knees, and crushed Mikey's fingers in his trembling hands. "Pete, I need you to breathe with me, please, look at me," Mikey whispered, as Pete slowly raised his head, and Mikey began to breathe in and out slowly, trying to encourage Pete to do the same. Scrunching his eyes up, Pete tried to slow his breathing, but failed until 5 minutes later, when, curled up in Mikey's arms, he began to breathe normally, and ended up crying onto Mikey's faded band shirt.

The taller boy wrapped the boy he barely knew in his arms,

"Ray said you were into astrology, right?" he said, trying to distract Pete from whatever thoughts were running through his head. The short boy nodded,

"I'm applying for the Spring Internships in NASA," Pete choked out. "It sounds really fucking childish, but I've always wanted to be an astronaut. If I get in, it'll give me a massive boost." Mikey smiled,

"I have no fucking clue what I want to do with my life. NASA sounds fucking awesome though." Pete grunted happily in response, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

"You know what I want to do? I want to go up to the moon, pull up the American flag, and throw it into space, just to piss everyone off," Pete confessed, through a watery laugh. Mikey chuckled,

"You ready to go downstairs now?" Pete nodded slowly, and stood up, turning so that he could see himself in the mirror. In only a few minutes, it looked like he had never been crying in the first place.

"I'm sorry about all that. I'm kind of afraid of thunder and lightning," Pete said shyly, looking down at his toes. The corners of Mikey's mouth twitched upwards.

"Hey, its fine. Everyone has fears." He ruffled the short boyâs hair, and the two began to walk downstairs, Mikey's arm draped over Pete's shoulders, the tattooed boy's head resting on his arm.

"You know, I've just always wanted to see the Stars."


	4. Chapter 3

"You good Wentz?" Ray asked, as the two walked downstairs together. Pete nodded, and Mikey removed his arm from over his shoulder. Frank threw a flashlight to both Mikey and Pete, missing horribly, and ending up with Mikey's hitting him directly in the eye. Gerard snorted as Frank dashed over to grab an ice pack from the freezer, while Mikey was hunched over, his eyes scrunched shut, one of them watering heavily. Pete had his hand on the taller boy's back, but was bent over in laughter.  
The sound of laughter filled the kitchen and Frank, almost comically, slipped on an ice cube that had fallen out of the freezer.

"Shi-ooph," he let out, as he fell to the ground suddenly. Gerard stuck out a hand, but was only pulled to the ground with Frank, all 5 boys weak with laughter. The giggles and splutters of 5 teenage boys collapsed on the floor, all because of a badly thrown flashlight, eventually died down, and one by one, they sat up. Gerard groaned,

"I go to college in a few months and I just spent 10 minutes laughing over a motherfucking flashlight that my idiot boyfriend threw in my brother's eye." Pete sat up sharply,

"You're going to college?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. Mikey giggled at the confused look on his face.

"Yeah, I'm 18, shortass." Gerard replied with a snigger, getting to his feet. "Studying art," he said, his eyes lighting up as he smiled. Frank took Gee's hand and pulled himself up, then suddenly struck a dramatic pose,

"Oh oui oui, I am le artiste, watch me paint, I shall woo all ze women with my vonderful portraits," he said, batting his eyes and flouncing around a disgruntled Gerard in a circle.

"Yeah yeah, Mr. Punk band, get a fucking candle," Gee said, punching Frank in the arm, smiling.  
A few hours, 16 candles, and a lot of pizza later, the 5 were on the floor, Frank stroking Gee's hair, whose head was lying in his lap. Mikey lay staring up at the ceiling with Pete's legs laying across his ankles. The silence was broken when Ray, who was leaning against the overstuffed armchair, turned his head towards Pete,

"Hey Pete, tell the others about Chicago!" Pete lifted his head from the floor, raising an eyebrow at the seemingly random request,

"Ok..." he said, moving his arms to behind his head.

"Well, I lived there until like, 2 months ago, but I lived there my whole life before then. My friend Patrick and I, we had it all planned out. I was gonna be an astronaut, and he was gonna sing, and the plan was that I would put a flag of the album cover on the moon." Pete smiled, "Fuckin' stupid idea really. Still wanna go to space though. But yeah, Pat and I knew thee 2 other guys, Joe and Andy. They were awesome, but yeah. I went to this space camp when I was 14, it was awesome, but I couldn't contact the guys for like 4 weeks, which was fucking torture. Me and Patrick had-"

"Patrick and I," Mikey muttered. Pete rolled his eyes,

"Sorry, Patrick and I had a thing for a bit, but after like a week we decided to just be friends. My parents weren't too happy when I came out, they're really fucking homophobic and transphobic, so I put it off forever. But yeah, some stuff happened and then I fucked off to band camp, where I met this ass," Pete gestured towards Ray, "Got my tattoos around the same time too, and I guess you kinda know the rest." He said, shrugging.

"Oh yeah, and did I mention I'm really fucking gay?" Laughter broke out in the candlelit room, and cries of "SAME" came from both Gerard and Frank.

"Looks like you and I are the only straights, Mikes," Ray said with a snigger. Pete made a noise that was probably meant to be nonchalant, but it came out slightly disappointed.

"Yeah, I guess," Mikey said, a little hesitantly. Pete sat up suddenly,

"Shit, what time is it?" Frank looked down at the glowing screen of his nearly dead phone,

"9:48." Pete jumped to his feet,

"Back in a second," he said, and dashed to the bathroom. He returned a few minutes later, threw something into his bag, and crossed his arms over his chest, returning to his original position. Anyone who could have seen his face up close would see the tear tracks across his cheeks, and the puffiness of his eyes.

"Going to sleep," he mumbled, turning onto his side and blowing out the candle in front of him before anyone could get a good look at him.

"You okay?" Mikey asked, moving slightly to face the shorter boy.

"Yeah 'm okay, night." Murmurs of 'Night' came from around the room, and with no phones, or even lights, to distract them, all 5 soon fell asleep.

The next morning, Pete woke up first, a baby blue blanket draped over his shoulders, the work of Ray the night before. He stood up, grabbed his bag, and quickly went into the bathroom to change, attempting to turn on the light at least 5 times before remembering the lack of power in the house. He came out to a bleary-eyed Frank stumbling around the kitchen, trying to find the fridge. Pete sniggered, and opened the fridge door,

"Thanks," Frank mumbled, grabbing the milk and pouring it half into a glass, half onto the marbled white countertop. He took a sip, and immediately spit it out onto Pete's black jeans,

"It's fucking WARM!" he yelled, and a scream came from the living room, quickly followed by a crash, as Mikey jumped up quickly, awoken by Frank's shout, and promptly fell back over, into the DVD cabinet. He groaned, and didn't hesitate to flip off his brother's boyfriend.

Over an hour later, when everyone was finally awake, and eating cereal with questionably fresh milk, Pete's phone began to buzz, and was picked up by Mikey.

"It's your mom," he said, handing the phone to Pete, who flinched as he took it.

"Going to the bathroom," he said, and hurriedly made his way to the bathroom, where he sat on the toilet, took a deep breath, and opened the messenger app.

Mikey knocked on the door when Pete hadn't come out for 15 minutes, and entered when Pete mumbled,

"Come in if you have to." He found the boy sitting with his back against the bathtub, tears flowing freely down his cheeks as he stared at his phone, which had turned off. Mikey sat next to him, and wrapped his arms around Pete's shaking frame. He looked down at the phone,

"C-can I...?" Pete nodded, unlocked the phone, and handed it to Mikey, who looked down at the messages.

 

'I want you to tell this to your aunt. Tell her 'I'm not playing for Ashley's child support anymore; her medical bills are too high.'

 

'When are you going to stop this nonsense, and come home? It's been months.'

 

'You know what, don't try to talk to me again until you've given up all this shit.'  
After pulling Pete into a tight hug, in which he was still crying violently, Mikey drew back and asked,

"Pete, who's Ashley?"


	5. Chapter 5

Pete looked up, and ran a hand through his short hair,

"I- Ashley is- was- Fuck," he curled up again, completely given up on trying not to cry. Breath shaking, Pete raised his head to look at Mikey's hair, unable to look him in the eyes.

"I-I'm a boy, right?" Mikey nodded, relaxing slightly.

"Well, I haven't always, always, I mean, because it's d-different. The-the reason we-I move-moved here, well, y-you see, FUCK!" he shouted, becoming angry with himself. Mikey wrapped his arms even tighter around the shaking boy.

"Breathe with me, c'mon."

When Pete had regained a normal breathing pattern and had stopped shaking slightly, he took a deep breath,

"Ashley is- was- used to be me." He said, and buried his head in Mikey's chest, as the older boy drew him in. "My parents kicked-kicked me out when I t-told them, so I had to-to m-move here with my aunt, a-and now my mum won't pay, w-won't pay f-for child support s-so I might have to stop T and I c-can't do th-that, I just can't, I d-don't want-" Pete let out a choked sob, becoming slightly hysterical, "I j-just don't want t-to go b-back to being a FUCKING G-GIRL!"  
Both boys were crying by now, if Mikey was slightly subtler.

"I can't go back to being Her. I can't do it," Pete whispered into Mikey's shoulder.

"You were never her. You never will be. No matter what you look like or sound like, you'll always be Pete, the boy. I promise."

"Really?" Mikey nodded.

"Always."


	6. Chapter 5

Pete sat, staring at his feet, hugging his knees to his chest. Mikey let his head fall onto the teary-eyed boy's shoulder. Pete whispered something, 

'What?' Mikey asked, lifting his head to look down at Pete.

"Thank you," he mumbled, then took a deep breath, "Do you ever get that feeling where you want to say something really simple but you just can't get the words out and they just kind of boil up inside until they burst out and you get really anxious and it's like you don't whether you should have said it or not?" 

"I don't think so..." Mikey said, wrapping his arms tighter around the shaking boy.

"Well, it happens a lot, even over simple things like 'I miss you' or 'thank you.' I hate it. I don't even know why I'm telling you this, I'm sorry." Pete said, looking up at Mikey.

"It's fine, really."   
Mikey took a deep breath, "I-I’m not the best at this, but Gee used to do this if I was upset, so do you maybe, if you want to, go down to the Torico’s place downtown and maybe get some ice cream? Mikey asked, blushing furiously, even though Pete was just another one of his friends, right? The tattooed boy’s face broke into a watery smile, 

“I’d like that, thanks.” 

—

A few minutes later, after a quick explanation of ‘Taking Pete for ice cream,’ and an understanding nod, Mikey was walking down the warm, yet cloudy street, Pete by his side, their shoulders awkwardly bumping together every few steps. 

"You're unfairly tall," Pete mumbled, laughing up at Mikey, whose unkempt hair kept falling in front of his eyes. 

"You know what, just... There," he reached up, on tiptoes, to move Mikey's hair into a pointed style that tapered down to the middle of his nose. Mikey looked over into a window to check his new 'hairstyle.'

"I'm... I'm ok with it," he said, almost smiling, just with the side of his mouth. He looked down at the stupidly grinning Pete, and snorted with laughter, almost falling into the road and just avoiding being hit by an oncoming car. “Stop laughing, you ass, I nearly died,” Mikey said, raising an eyebrow and smiling. 

They walked in silence for a minute or two, the blare of car horns and the chatter of suburban mom gossip from coffee shops filling the air, until Mikey stopped walking, turning towards the Ice Cream parlour. It wasn’t until the third “PETE!” that the shorter boy stopped walking, and ran back to where Mikey was laughing. 

“Come on, idiot,” he said, opening the door to a flood of rich, chocolatey and fruity smells. The ice cream parlor was decorated as if it was the 1950s, with a red, white, and pastel theme. Only 3 other people sat inside, too focused on their phones and laptops to hear the small bell that rang as Pete and Mikey walked in. A bored looking girl who seemed to be about 16 stood behind the counter, wearing a black shirt and red-and-white striped apron. She glanced up at the two boys, 

“Hey, what can I get for you guys?” she said, false enthusiasm drowning her words. Mikey looked over the flavours, while Pete jumped ahead and ordered,

“Yeah hi, can I get a rainbow sherbet one scoop in a cone?” The girl nodded, and quickly made both Pete and Mikey’s ice creams. 

“Have a great day,” she said in a monotone voice while taking the money handed over by Mikey. 

The two boys walked outside with their ice creams, and sat down at a rusted black table, which seemed like it could fall apart at any second. They ate mostly in an awkward silence, Pete’s eyes wandering around the alien town, while Mikey’s stayed mostly glued to the table. 

“Do you think plants have emotions?” Pete said suddenly, looking over at a run-down florist’s. 

“What the fuck are you on?” Mikey snorted, following the gaze of tattoo-covered boy, who shrugged. The two looked back at each other in near synchronization, and spent only a few seconds looking into each other’s eyes before bursting out laughing. 

—

10 minutes later, they were walking down the street, with Mikey pointing out all the annoying people from school, places to avoid, and places with the best coffee. 

“You’ll like it here,” he said, looking over at a small, pretentious looking coffee shop, where workers in all black were setting out flower baskets. 

“I never really got those things,” Pete mentioned, “they just kind of get in your face and block up the sidewalk. They should just put up like posters and shit instead, more interesting and less fucking annoying.” Mikey laughed, and nodded his head. 

After only a few minutes of wandering in silence, Pete decided it would be a good idea to try and lean on Mikey’s shoulder as they walked. 

The plan was fine, the execution not so much. He began to lean sideways, but didn’t take into account the fact that leaning onto someone’s shoulder while both moving is not the best idea. Mikey let out a small yell as a blur of tattoos and black t-shirt fell in front of him, and he somehow managed to accidentally grab Pete’s shoulder as he fell, leaving him in an almost tango-esque dip position.

“It looks like I really fell for you,” Pete said, wiggling his eyebrows and winking. Mikey snorted,

"Fuck you Wentz.”

“Maybe later, Way.”

“Fuck you to the power of ten, you ass.”

“You have to admit it is a fine ass,” more eyebrow wiggling and winking ensued, until Mikey dropped Pete onto the sidewalk and began to walk away laughing. 

“I’m not moving until you pick me up," Pete complained, laying on the hard concrete with his head hanging over the curb, dangerously close to oncoming cars.

Swearing at the ‘motherfucking drama queen’ under his breath, Mikey walked over and lifted Pete from the ground, bridal style, and didn’t notice the latter had fallen asleep in his arms until they reached the car. 

“Goddamn it Wentz, you’re too adorable for your own good,” he mumbled, looking down at the sleeping drama queen. 

He carefully put Pete into the passenger seat of the car, shaking him gently awake before beginning the familiar drive back to Ray’s house. 

—

“Hey,” Mikey said to an empty kitchen, dropping the car keys on top of Gerard’s crumpled jacket, and made his way down to where the TV was blaring out the Star Wars theme.

“Power’s back on then?”

Frank screamed, having not seen Mikey or Pete come in,

“Fuck you, and yes.” 

Pete laughed, his smile noticeably dimmer now that they were back inside. He walked over to the breaking couch, where he sat in the corner and was quickly joined by Mikey, who turned bright red when Pete leant over and rested his head on the blushing boy’s shoulder.

“You’re alright, Mikey Way.”


	7. Chapter 6

The next week passed uneventfully, Ray being away in California with his family, and Pete having refused any offer to get together with Mikey and Gerard. Frank had been staying the night for the past few days, as his less than accepting grandparents were staying the weekend at his house.

Mikey lay on his bedroom floor, having been playing bass for the last 2 hours and getting nowhere. The bass lay next to him, the strap resting over his chest. A loud buzzing against the instrument caused Mikey to sit up suddenly, the neck of the bass hitting him in the knees, causing him to yell out in pain.

He picked up his phone, quietly cursing it, and swiped to answer the call,

“This better be fucking worth me breaking my kneecaps, you ass,” Mikey said, only half-jokingly.

“Nice to hear from you too,” came the laughing voice of none other than Pete Wentz through the speaker of the phone.

“Anyway, I’m bored off my ass and my Aunt and Uncle aren’t here so yeah.” Before Mikey could get a word in, Pete quickly jumped back in, 

“Wait, is Frank there?” Mikey nodded, then remembered that Pete couldn’t see him,

“Uh, yeah, he’s been here the last few days, staying the night. Why?”

“Ooh, okay, awesome, so I was wondering if you guys wanted to come over and maybe spend the night or something? I just don’t want to have to stay here alone all night, and you guys have never been over and we have a shit ton of popcorn and movies and we could like watch them and-” Pete’s increasingly worried rambling was cut short by a short laugh from Mikey,

“Yeah, we can come over. You need to chill out, seriously,” he said, smiling.

“Oh, ok, cool. So, I’ll see you guys around like 2 or something?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Ok, cool. Bye!”

“Bye, asshole,” Mikey hung up smiling, and stood up reluctantly, running down the stairs to tell Gerard and Frank about the plans.

Only an hour later, the three found themselves in Gerard’s sputtering car.

“This isn’t some ruse to get us into a house party, is it?” Gerard grumbled from the back of the car, where   
Frank was lying with his head in his boyfriend’s lap.

“No, you fucking idiot. He literally moved a month ago, he’s not gonna know anyone yet,” Frank replied, turning his head to look up at Gee, who laughed.

“You’re fucking adorable,” he said, moving Frank’s fringe off his face, revealing his smile.

“Well, one of us has to be. If we were both just amazingly hot, the world wouldn’t be able to handle us,” Frank replied, wiggling his eyebrows jokingly. Mikey violently cleared his throat,

“Can you save this for the 23 hours of the day where you’re together and I’m not in a car with you?”

“Sorry Mikes,” Gerard said, laughing quietly. The rest of the short car ride was spent in silence, except for the loud music blaring through the car’s speakers.

Checking the address Pete had sent him for what seemed like the 600th time, Mikey looked through the house numbers in the street before pulling up in front of a mint green painted house, with no cars on the driveway. Frank got out of the car first, and almost ran to the door, then began aggressively ringing the doorbell, much to Mikey and Gerard’s annoyance. A disgruntled Pete opened the door, holding a large bulldog by the collar,

“Fuck you, Iero,” he said, laughing. The dog began to jump up, scrabbling against Frank’s knees. He bent down and began to scratch the dog behind the ear, letting it lick him all over his face.

“That’s disgusting,” Mikey said, walking through the door to join Pete and Gerard, who were watching Frank being tackled by the seemingly small dog.

“Hey! Bronx!” Pete shouted, and the dog looked up at the tattooed boy. “C’mere!” he called, and the dog ran over to him, looking up with its head tilted sideways. Pete kneeled down and picked up Bronx, motioning with his head to follow him through the uncharacteristically clean, white house, to a living room with worn leather sofas, a brown coffee table, and a tv mounted on the wall. The kitchen was directly next to the living room, separated only by the change in flooring from carpet to wooden floor.

“Well, um, this is my house, I guess,” Pete said, letting Bronx jump out of his arms and onto the scratched coffee table.

“Cool,” Frank said, as Pete went to get popcorn from the cupboard. Frank immediately picked up the dog again, and completely ignored the rest of the world. Gerard flopped down on the sofa next to him, and began to rest his head on his boyfriend’s shoulder, who completely ignored him.

“Fraaaaannnk,” Gee began to nuzzle his head into Frank’s neck, flicking his hair in his face. “Pay attention to meeeeeee.” Frank just laughed, continuing to play with the dog as Gerard gave up, and sunk back into the couch.

“I’ve been replaced,” Gerard mumbled to Mikey, who was sat next to him, laughing.

Frank quickly stopped playing with the dog as he was hit in the back of the head by a flying can of Coke, sending both Gerard and Mikey into a flurry of laughter. Frank turned around to see Pete holding another can, laughing too had to throw it again.

“Fuck you Wentz, fuck you.”

“Serves you right for not paying attention to me,” Gerard said, letting Frank fall sideways so his head was resting on his leg.

When everyone had drinks, and was sitting on the sofa, Pete pulled up Netflix, and began to scroll through movies.

Two movies and one episode of Stranger Things later, Pete pulled out his phone and ordered pizzas, one pepperoni and sausage, and one veggie. Half of each was finished quickly, and Frank had somehow migrated to sitting on the floor, his head resting on Gee’s legs. Pete had been up and down the entire time, and was now sitting at the end of the sofa, away from everyone else.

Mikey moved over, laying his arm over Pete’s shoulders and letting his head fall on top of the shorter boy’s. Pete moved his arm around Mikey, and turned to lean into his chest. Mikey smiled, then Pete looked up.

“Come with me, I wanna show you something cool.”


	8. Chapter 7

As Mikey walked through the house with an increasingly excited Pete, he looked around at the walls that seemed to have far too many clocks, all of which were identical.

"C'mon, I want to show you something!" Pete exclaimed, grabbing the tall boy by the elbow, and pulling him up the stairs, into his room.

When Mikey reached the room, he was immediately entranced by the dark blue, purple, and black walls, which were plastered in posters. The unmade bed in the middle of the room was adorned with star-shaped pillows and black and purple bedsheets, and despite the messy comforter and sheets, the rest of the room seemed immaculate, completely undermining the 'rebellious punk teenager' stereotype that Pete fit into almost too perfectly. Mikey's gaze was soon drawn to the ceiling, where, hand painted on a black and blue background, was the entire documented universe, each constellation and planet labelled in red paint.

Mikey's admiration of the ceiling was interrupted by a scraping noise from the corner of the room. He looked over to see Pete removing the fly screen from his window with a cheeky smile.

"Not afraid of heights, are you?" Mikey shook his head, almost smiling. "Good," Pete said, putting on a black backpack and climbing out of the window onto the sloped roof. Mikey walked cautiously to the window, looking through onto the 2 foot drop to the roof. Pete put out a hand,

"Do you trust me?" he asked, trying not to smile.

"You fucking nerd," Mikey laughed, taking Pete's hand and clambering out the window. Mikey slipped, causing his face to turn bright red in the dim, golden light that shone from the setting, 9 O'clock sun. 

Running up the sloped tiles, Mikey pulled Pete from his revere as he yanked his arm forwards, causing him to fall forwards. Pete just laughed, and waited for Mikey to get back on his feet until he ran up further, pulling the taller boy with him to a flat surface, where he let go of his hand and opened the backpack. 

When an out-of-breath Mikey sat cross-legged next to Pete, a folded piece of shiny paper, a small telescope, and 6 boxes of Nerds and Skittles were laid out on a dark red blanket, on which they were both sitting.

"How long have you been planning this?" Mikey asked, looking over at Pete, who was blushing pink.

"Well, it took me three days to actually ask you and the others to come over. I almost called you about 5 times but I got too nervous every time," he laughed shyly, "But yeah, once I finally got the courage to ask you, I put this together, I guess. Yeah, I, um, like showing my friends this place, I suppose."

Mikey hummed in understanding, and leaned back on his hands to watch the sky fade quickly from pale orangey pink, to a tangerine orange, to almost blood red, and finally to a dark, hazy purple. The colours entranced Mikey, but he soon noticed that Pete was staring straight up. Freckled stars dotted the sky, dim against the navy-blue sky, bur becoming more visible every second. Mikey sat up properly, grabbing a box of Nerds, absentmindedly eating them as he lay back down next to Pete.

"That's Sirius," Pete said, pointing up to a group of seemingly unconnected stars above them. Mikey pointed along to the left of where Pete was looking,

"It's like someone opened a time rift or something," he said, smiling slightly. Pete laughed,

"That's the Milky Way, you asshat." Mikey mumbled about how he 'already knew, and just thought it looked cool,' while blushing profusely.

The two fell back into a comfortable silence, the warm, summer night air washing over them. It was perfectly quiet on the roof, with only the distant sounds of passing cars breaking the silence. Mikey quietly took Pete's hand in his, their fingers weaving together. After no longer than a half a minute, Pete began to snigger.

"What?" Mikey asked, looking over at him.

"It's you," Pete pointed up at the Milky Way.

"Wha- for fuck's sake Pete," Mikey said, beginning to laugh as well. The two lay there, laughing almost 3 more minutes.

"It shouldn't be this funny," Pete mumbled, burying his face in Mikey's shoulder.

After calming down, the two lay side by side again, Pete resting his head on Mikey. "M'cold,' he muttered, turning onto his side to get closer to Mikey, who sat up, causing Pete to do the same. He put his arm around the shorter boy, letting him rest his head on his shoulder and drawing him in closer to his side. 

They sat there in peace, the world seemingly frozen in place around them, they were untouchable in their small world of stars and streetlamps.

The two boys had very different, yet almost connected, thoughts running through their heads. Pete remembered another roof in another state, both geographically and mentally. He shivered at the memory, and curled up closer to Mikey, who was remembering the roof at his grandma's house, how he had always tried to climb up the walls like Spiderman to reach it when he was younger. More thoughts began to run through Pete's head in that moment, choices, or rather, a choice, and decisions. Like forcing the words 'thank you' from his mouth all those weeks ago, he swallowed his nerves and tilted his head up, kissing Mikey softly on the cheek. The taller boy's head shot up, his face growing steadily redder along with Pete's.

"I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have- I mean, you're straight and you probably have a girlfriend. Oh god I've ruined everything, I'm so sorry, I should have asked and-" Pete kept talking, words pouring from his mouth in a panicked frenzy. He began to clamber down the roof, almost running away from Mikey. He stepped through the window and ran to his bed, where he brought his knees up to his chest, afraid of the tiny act he had done, paranoia and anxiety setting in.

A clattering and a loud, "Fuck!" came from the roof as Mikey slid from the flattened area, all the way to where his feet caught in the gutter. Pete let out an involuntary snort of laughter as he heard Mikey attempt to scramble his way back to the window, up the slanted roof and to Pete's room. He reached the windowsill to see Pete offering a hand to help him through the window, which Mikey took.

"I-I'm sorry," Pete muttered, his face falling slightly as he looked down towards his feet. The color in Mikey's face began to rise,

"It's ok, really," he said, smiling. Pete looked back up into hazel eyes, and rose up onto his toes.

A million thoughts raced through Mikey's head in that moment.

'Holy shit. I'm kissing Pete Wentz. Pete Wentz. A guy. A male. A gay guy. Am I gay? I'm gay. Oh god, I'm gay. I'M KISSING PETE WENTZ. He's hot. How long have I liked him? Was I denying it until he showed that he might like me too? Did I like him when Ray first showed us pictures of him? When we first met? Fuck. I'm gonna have to tell Gee. This can't be real. AH!'

Pete lowered back down to stand normally, and the two boys shared a look, then immediately burst into almost silent laughter, neither one able to contain their smiles. Reaching out to hold Mikey's hand, and interlacing their fingers, Pete motioned towards the roof.

"Give me a second," Mikey said, letting go of Pete's hand and leaving the room, heading downstairs, and hesitating on the last step before walking into the living room, where Gerard sat on the couch, a sleeping Frank resting his head on his lap. "Gee?" Gerard looked over at his brother, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm gay."


	9. Chapter 8

Gerard quickly stood up and pulled Mikey into a tight hug, pinning his arms to his side. A huge smile spread across his face, not caring that he was crushing his head into his younger brother's shoulder,

"Is it Pete? It's Pete isn't it. Did you fucking kiss him?" Mikey looked away, his face growing pink. "Oh my god you kissed him," Gerard turned around to the sofa, "I told y- Frank?"

A hand rose from the gap between the coffee table and the sofa, which was quickly grabbed by Gee, who pulled his now disgruntled boyfriend back up to his feet. Frank let his head fall onto Gerard's shoulder and mumbled a quiet "I hate you," into his shoulder. Mikey stood by, slightly awkwardly, still blushing.

"Get the fuck back upstairs to your boyfriend and hold fuckin hands or something," Gee laughed, pushing at Mikey's shoulder.

"I- he's not my- we're not- I mean... Fuck it, I'm going back to the roof."

When Mikey met Pete back on the roof, his tattooed arms were covered with a light grey hoodie that seemed to be at least 2 sizes too big for him.

"Mikey?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't want to go back to school. I haven't actually gone to school yet as... well, as Pete I guess. I mean moving might help, but they're gonna call me a name that isn't mine, and PE, and bullying and everything. 

I'm just fucking terrified." Pulling Pete closer with the arm wrapped around his shoulder, Mikey looked up at the twinkling lights above,

"You could tell them, the teachers, tell them your name's Pete. They should listen. And if not, you can tell your Aunt and Uncle or something, and I'll stick with you. It's my first year without Gee there, he leaves in September with Frank for college but we'll have Ray with us, I guess."

"Yeah. I just hate being called Ashley, and if the other kids find out, I'll just get bullied and it'll be shitty all over again." Pete leaned into Mikey's side, smiling as the taller boy let his head rest against Pete's.

"We'll be okay. I promise."

The two sat on the roof in silence, looking out at the stars with their arms around each other, trying to forget about the box of Nerds now in the gutter, safe from the world.


	10. Chapter 9

"Pete? Pete!" Mikey whispered, shaking the motionless boy whose head rested on his shoulder. "Pete!" he almost shouted, laughing when Pete groaned, opening his eyes slowly and turning his head to look up at Mikey, who smiled at his tired face. "I thought you weren't going to wake up for a second there."

"I'm not gonna die on you, Mikey, don't worry." Mikey just smiled, and pulled Pete closer to himself. The night had reached what was almost its darkest point, the sky filled with the shattered light of stars and wisps of thin clouds. The slightly green, dark brown tiles were amazingly cold by now, regardless of the warm breeze flowing through the air.

"C'mon, we can't stay out here all night. It's freezing." He put out a hand, which Pete took and used to get to his feet, slipping slightly on the cold tiles. Mikey caught him by the elbow, linking their fingers and not letting go until they were both safely through the window.

After replacing the fly screen and dragging the window closed again, Pete flopped down on his bed, laying diagonally across it while Mikey sat, slightly awkwardly, on the edge, looking around the room. Pete lifted his head up slightly,

"You wanna watch a movie?" he asked, leaning over and pulling a laptop from under his bed, moving to sit on the bed with his back against the wall, and pulling up Netflix. Mikey moved to join him, and shrugged,

"Sure." The corners of Pete's mouth twitched upwards,

"Cool, you wanna watch Nightmare Before Christmas?" he asked, attempting not to let his face break out in a grin as Mikey raised an eyebrow, smiling,

"You emo fuck," he moved over next to Pete, who let his head rest on the taller boy's shoulder as the movie began to play.

Only half an hour later, Mikey looked over to see the face of a sleeping Pete Wentz, smiling gently and peacefully on his shoulder. 

That smile was contagious even when he was asleep, and Mikey couldn't help but break into a smile purely from just how adorable 

Pete was. He was almost completely peaceful when asleep, not troubled by thoughts of family, school, or judgement. Black eyeliner, though slightly smudged away, still ringed his eyes in typical Pete fashion.

Letting out an involuntary yawn, Mikey closed the laptop, and carefully moved Pete's head onto the pillow rather than his shoulder before placing the laptop on the ground. He cautiously reached over and pulled the constellation patterned comforter to cover Pete, before grabbing another pillow and curling up on the floor towards the middle of the room.

After an hour or two, Pete woke with a jolt, unsure of why until he felt the constricting material twisted around his chest. "Shit." He whispered, pushing off the comforter that he could only assume 

Mikey had placed over him. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed, and began to stumble around in the darkness until he felt his foot catch on some kind of cord or wire and- "Fuckfuckfuckshit ah motherfu-"

"You okay?" Mikey croaked, his throat still riddled with sleep. Pete nodded, then realized that it was pitch black, and that Mikey did not have night vision at all,

"Yeah, I'm good, just tripped. Sorry for waking you up, I just need to go to the bathroom," he said, a little hesitantly, picking his way over books and various space magazines to get to the bathroom. When there, he wrestled his way out of the black binder he had forgotten to take off, and made his way back to bed.

"Hey Mikey?"

"Yeah?"

"You need a blanket?"

Mikey sat up, "Uh, yeah, please." Pete nodded, and grabbed an incredibly soft dark blue blanket from the shelf of his closet.

"Well, night." Mikey smiled,

"Night."

A dreamless sleep fell over Pete as he curled onto his side, pulling the covers up to his chin so that he was almost drowning in the comforter. Mikey, however, lay awake, staring up as he let the blanket lay over himself carelessly. The painted constellations, white stars glowing faintly in the darkness, almost hypnotized him until his eyes drifted closed, and a peaceful sleep endued.

Pete was woken abruptly the next morning by the buzzing of his phone on the bedside table. He quickly dismissed the call, and sat up, bleary eyed from both sleep and the excessive amount of eyeliner now having clouded over his eyes. He sighed heavily, then clambered out of bed and towards the bathroom, bringing with him his phone and binder.

When in front of the mirror, Pete lifted up his shirt to just above his belly button, inspecting the patches of skin that had been rubbed raw from wearing a binder for too long. Dried blood was spattered around the shallow wounds, and Pete winced as he put his shirt back down. 

Sighing again, he picked up a pack of makeup wipes due to the fact that what was once 'edgy' emo eyeliner had become what looked like the after effects of a terrible experiment with a raccoon.

Staring back at his blank face in the mirror, Pete pulled the binder back over his head, holding his breath as it touched the blistered skin. 

The doorknob rattled, causing Pete to fall backwards into the towel holder, knocking it off the wall and falling with it.

"Pete? You okay?" Mikey croaked through the door, sleep still plaguing his voice.

Picking himself up off the floor, along with about 4 towels, Pete looked down dejectedly upon the fallen towel rack.

"Uh, yeah." He said, throwing the towels into the dry shower, picking up his phone, and leaving the bathroom.

After changing into a pair of black skinny jeans, an extremely faded t-shirt that had a logo on it at some point, and outrageously odd socks, Pete sat on his bed, flopping backwards and laying there until 

Mikey came out of the bathroom. He still didn't move until the taller boy came over, sat down on the corner of the bed, and looked Pete directly in the eyes.

"Don't you fucking dare," Pete warned, before curling up in uncontrollable laughter as Mikey began to tickle him mercilessly, Pete punching him weakly in the arm until he stopped, interrupted by the loud ringing of the galaxy cased phone on Pete's bedside table. 

Without looking at the caller ID, the tattooed boy who was now gasping for breath from laughter picked up the phone and answered the call.

He froze in fear as a scarily familiar voice came over the speaker,

 

"Ashley?"


	11. Chapter 10

Static. The only thing filling my head.

Static and words.

Words I never wanted to hear again, a voice I didn't want to flood my thoughts for the rest of eternity.

I was back at home, in the kitchen, the silence deafening. The simple presence of my mother was suffocating, my hands shook uncontrollably.

Walking over to the cabinet, avoiding her piercing gaze from by the fridge, I reached up, rising onto my toes and grabbing a glass.

"Ashley?" almost instantly, I felt the glass slip from my trembling hands and a rush of ice cold shivers flooded through me as it hit the ground and shattered. The fact that she didn't say anything, simply watched as I fumbled my way to a brush, tears forcing their way to my eyes, stung more than the yelling that was sure to come.

I felt my breath catch in my throat, I couldn't move, the image in my head turned to static. There was no outside world, only the darkness of my mind and the fuzziness blocking everything else out.

"Stop shaking stop FUCKING SHAKING!" I tried to yell, but it came out as only a whisper as hot tears began to run down my cheeks. I had stopped breathing, shallow gasps of air flooding my lungs for a fraction of a second before disappearing in a panicked haze.

From the background of the buzzing blocking my ears from the outside world, I could hear faint murmurs of single words,

"Breathe. Breathe with me, come on."

A faint hint of safety wrapped me up like a blanket, a rising and falling chest that I couldn't help but imitate brought me back to the verge of reality, my shallow breaths still hesitant.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mikey wrapped his arms tightly around Pete, refusing to let go until his breathing evened out and the shaking became less violent. He smiled as a tearstained face pressed into his cheek, tattooed arms reaching out to pull him closer, one final shaky breath let out before they both pulled away, Mikey taking Pete's hands in his own. The phone had fallen off the bed a while ago, the call hung up after an angry, "Leave him the fuck alone," from Mikey.

"She can't touch you, she isn't here, ok? Everything will be okay, I promise." He looked over at Pete's tear-streaked face, rubbing circles on the backs of his hands with his thumbs.

"I'm sorry," Pete mumbled, looking down to avoid Mikey's gaze. Mikey pulled him back into his arms,

"You have nothing to be sorry for, nothing. I promise you." Pete melted into Mikey's arms, closing his eyes and letting himself simply be wrapped in a blanket of comfort and safety.

5 minutes felt like 5 hours before Mikey pulled away, "You wanna coffee?" Pete nodded silently as Mikey draped a blanket over his shoulders and made his way out of the room. 

Mikey crept downstairs, cautious as to not wake Gerard and Frank, who lay on the sofa, heads on each other's shoulders, arms wrapped around one another, both of them peaceful and protected by the other. Smiling at his sleeping brother and boyfriend, he made his way over to the coffee machine in the kitchen, putting a pot of coffee on to brew before pulling 3 mugs from the cupboard.

A tired groan came from the couch at the clattering and clinking of the mugs,

"Mikey? That you?" Frank's sleep plagued voice reached the kitchen over the sound of brewing coffee.

"Y-yeah, want a coffee?" Mikey asked, hand hovering over a fourth mug. All he heard was a tired, muffled grunt, which he took to mean yes.

After pouring 4 mugs of coffee, he brought two over to the living room, where the tv was still playing some shitty American cult movie. 

Taking his mug, Frank nudged Gerard's shoulder until he yawned, and sleepily accepted the black cup Mikey had held out for him.

"Morning Gee, don't spill it," he warned, before making his way back up the carpeted, yet slightly creaky stairs while attempting not to spill a drop of the two mugs of coffee he held in his hands along with a cookie he had found in the cupboard.

Entering Pete's room by attempting to gently kick open the door and failing miserably, he found Pete lying on his side on his bed, scrolling through Tumblr on his phone.

"Pete?" He said cautiously, moving so he could put the coffee on the bedside table, which was a task in itself, due to the sheer amount of pens, earbuds, wires, and lamps littering the wooden surface. Pete sat up and smiled,

"Thanks Mikey." Picking up the dark blue mug speckled with stars, some connected to form constellations, he took a sip and made a face. "Bitter..." he mumbled, smiling.

"What did you expect? Coffee isn't meant to taste like cupcakes and sugar," Mikey laughed, flinching as Pete made a move as if to throw his coffee at him.

"Shut up, asshole," Pete said, sipping through a smile. Joining Pete in sitting on the bed, Mikey handed him the cookie before pulling a worn, obviously well-read comic from his bag and opening it, skimming words and looking at pictures he had seen at least 15 times before, whether over Gee's shoulder or on his own, in the school library or his bedroom.

Peering over to read the comic, Pete let his head rest on the tall boy's shoulder, smiling as Mikey leant his head over to lay on top of Pete's.

The two sat there in silence, Pete nodding whenever he finished the page so Mikey could turn to the next page of the comic, occasionally laughing or pointing out lines or drawings.

"To be honest, I have no idea what's going on but the art is amazing."

"Yeah, Gee made it about a year ago for me," Mikey smiled.

"Gerard does art? I thought he did like... not art, I don't know,"

"Yeah, he- he's going to arts college with Frank in October." Mikey looked down at the bed, folding and unfolding the corner of the comic. Pete wrapped an arm around his back, unspoken words of comfort calming Mikey, and in that moment, they were untouchable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tada!  
> *slightly ironic jazz hands*  
> -Planetary


	12. Chapter 11

Lingering at the doorway, Mikey waited until Gerard and Frank had entered the car before leaning down slightly and giving Pete a hug. He felt tattooed arms hug him back immediately, and the two shared a shy smile.

"I'll see you in a few weeks then?" Mikey questioned, pulling away from Pete.

"Yeah, unless we see each other before school, that is."

"Cool, well, um, bye then," Mikey waved, picking up his bag and making his way to the car, and Frank began to make his way back to the Ways' house.

After dropping Frank home, Gerard and Mikey were welcomed into the house with a shout from the living room,

"Gerard Arthur Way, if I find mud on my carpets one more time, I will destroy every pair of shoes you own."

"Love you too, mom," Gerard shouted back, kicking his shoes off and making his way to the fridge, while Mikey ran up the stairs to his room, leaning against his bed and pulling out his phone to a message from one of his few internet friends.  
Only an hour later, Mikey heard his name called from downstairs,

"WHAT IS IT GEE?"

"JUST COME DOWNSTAIRS."

Mikey rolled his eyes, and made his way down to the living room, where Gerard was sitting with a controller and Mario Kart up on the screen.

"No, not again. Every single time you beat me, we are not doing this. Every. Single. Fucking. Time," Mikey said, while backing away slowly.

"Come on Mikes, we haven't done this in ages! Just one round?"

Mikey tried to maintain a straight face as he sat down on the couch, picking up a second controller while raising an eyebrow at Gee, who was grinning smugly. Hunched over the controllers, both brothers immediately switched into competitive mode, Gerard occasionally nudging Mikey's hands to throw him off the course,

"I swear I will throw you into the kitchen if you don't stop that, Gee."

"Try me, bitch," Gerard laughed back, hitting his brother with a bolt of lightning.

"MotherFUCKER!" Mikey shouted, pushing Gerard off the sofa.

"Michael!" Donna shouted, walking into the room only to laugh at the sight of her eldest son lying on the ground while Mikey remained focused on the game, throwing down the controller when he won. Standing up, he leaned over and let out a 'Ha!' laughing at Gerard.

"C'mon Gee, get up."

"Can't. I'm dead," he mumbled from the ground. Mikey flopped back down on the sofa,

"Gerard."

"Shhhhhh I'm dead."

"I'll just beat you again if you're not going to even try to play."

"You have to pull me up."

Sighing, Mikey looked down at his odd socks, catching a glimpse of black phone case under the sofa. Smirking, he picked it up and dangled it above his brother's face, moving back as Gee reached up to grab it, and running away up the stairs.

"Mikey! Give it back!" Gerard called, getting up from the floor less than gracefully, and chasing after his brother to the landing of the second floor, where he tackled him to the ground, struggling to pin the arm down that didn't have the phone. Laughing, Mikey twisted away and began to run again, holding Gerard's phone out ahead of him until he tripped, sprawling out on the floor with his arm outstretched, glasses about a foot away.

Gee dove to grab the phone, just as Mikey clutched it to his chest, causing his brother to scrabble at his hands,

"I will not fucking hesitate to tickle you if you don't give it back," Gerard warned, laughing with a serious glint in his eyes. Now slightly more threatened, Mikey hurled the phone at the wall opposite him, the color draining from his brother's face as he sprinted towards the possibly broken phone.

Upon finding it still intact, Gerard made his way to a now sitting Mikey and laughed,

"Asshole."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Only five minutes later, the two were sat at the table, neither of them having the compulsion to change the program on the TV from Spongebob, or to admit that it was actually not horrible. A bowl of popcorn sat between the two, along with Mikey's math homework and Gee's sketchbook.

"I really think your drawing could be improved by just..." Mikey leaned over, adding a large circle with a cross through it in place of the undrawn eye of the in-progress character on the sketchbook page.

Without even looking up, Gerard raised an eyebrow, picked up a piece of popcorn, and threw it across at Mikey, hitting him square in the forehead and earning himself a middle finger.

"It's actually pretty good though," Mikey said, attempting to turn his head to see the sketch the right way round. At this, Gee looked up.

"Thanks Mikes."

The two sat in silence for another twenty minutes, each working on their respective projects with the occasional throwing of pencils and popcorn out of frustration, mostly from Mikey. After the 3rd time picking up his pencil from the ground opposite him, Mikey's torrents of annoyance were interrupted as Donna entered the room from her office, immediately looking over Mikey's shoulder at his work.

"Divide."

Mikey mumbled a quick 'thank you,' and kept going with his work.

"You two want bagels?" Donna asked, walking over to the cupboard. Both brothers nodded,

"Great, come and make them yourselves then," she retorted, smiling.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten minutes later, the three were sat at the counter in the kitchen eating, bombarded by the awful puns that come from the mind of a bored Mikey Way.

"I find people who cut the crusts off sandwiches really uncrustworthy." Although smiling, the others just groaned,

"Mikey if you make another fucking pun I will kill myself," Gerard stated, only realizing what he had said when the previously   
laughing Mikey went silent, the color draining from his face. "Mikes, I'm sorry I didn't mean it, you know I didn't." Mikey just shook his head, walking to his room in silence.

Gerard followed quickly after, leaning against the white wooden door that wouldn't open.

"Mikey, please, I didn't mean it. Please let me in."

The only response he got was broken sobs from inside the room, stinging reminders of a night never forgotten.


	13. Chapter 12

At the creaking of the door, Mikey looked up to see his brother’s tearstained face and raised eyebrow. He nodded, and leaned into Gerard as he sat beside him, wrapping his arms around Mikey’s hunched over body. An unspoken apology passed as Gee let his head rest on Mikey’s shoulder, saying nothing to ridicule him as he wiped away tears from his face with the end of a slightly too small black hoodie.

“Is that mine?” Gerard turned to face Mikey, who nodded, pulling the sleeves over his hands. “I- Look, I’m so sorry, Mikes. For all of it.” He pulled his brother closer, trying to protect him from all the shit in the world, as if a hug would keep him safe forever. Mikey nodded, leaning into Gerard and trying to forget the memories and nightmares that had plagued him for over 2 years.

“I’m always gonna be there for you, Mikes. Don’t ever worry about that. I’ll call you when I’m at college, I promise. I’m going to stay here, you know I am. For you, for Frankie, for Ray. Hell, even for Pete. You’ll always be my amazing little brother, the one who can play the bass fucking amazingly, who can’t seem to keep his glasses on for more than ten seconds. You mean so much to me, I’m so sorry.” 

Choking slightly on tears, Mikey leaned back and looked up at his brother, “Do-do you remember that one Christmas? Where you tried to learn the bass just so you could teach me how to play the one I got?” Gerard nodded, smiling. “I couldn’t do half the things I can now without you, Gee. I’m gonna miss you.” 

“I’m gonna miss you too, Mikes. You have no idea.” 

The two sat in silence, dried tears forgotten in conversation and apologies. It was over ten minutes later when Donna came in, awkwardly holding three coffees at the same time, placing one in front of each boy, sipping her own as she sat down in front of them. 

The mood was abruptly ruined by the blaring noise of a call on Donna's phone. Putting down her coffee, she glanced at caller ID.

"Oh fuck OFF Carol," she grumbled, sliding the phone away after declining the call. Mikey leant away from Gerard so he was sitting up, back against the bed, ends of the black hoodie pulled over his hands as to protect them from the burning of his mug. 

Donna smiled sadly at the sight of her eldest son looking guiltily down at his empty mug, his expression clouded. She gave a sad sigh before walking over and pulling him into a hug, to which he barely even tried to escape from.

"Look, you may be all 'grown up' now, but you're still my son and I still love you, no matter what. You hear me, Gee?" Gerard nodded, smiling as his mom pulled away and walked downstairs, mumbling about 'fucking Carol and her inability to perform simple human tasks.' 

"Hey Gee?" Mikey asked, looking over at his brother, lost in thought.

"Yeah?"

"Can-can I show you the song I'm learning?" 

Gerard's face immediately lit up, a smile broadening. "Definitely." Mikey smiled, and grabbed his bass from the stand in the corner, plugging it into his small, battered amp, and beginning to play. Gee smiled, and hummed the melody of the tune as Mikey played, remembering a time where they would go to people's houses and his brother would spend ages poring over the instruments, trying them out until he found the bass, and never really put it down after then.

When the half of the song that Mikey had learned was over, he looked up expectantly, letting the bass drop to hold on the strap.

“Nice one, Mikey Way.”


	14. Chapter 13

Pete lay on his bed, scrolling mindlessly through Tumblr as he waited for an alert from one of the many group chats that constantly bombarded his notifications. His aunt and uncle had returned from their weekend break only a day ago, just missing Gerard, Frank, and Mikey, and were now in the backyard, most likely with sunhats over their faces, sleeping, or in lawn chairs, reading in the sun.

Rolling over, Pete slid off the bed, putting his phone back in the pocket of his black jeans, which he stubbornly continued to wear in the 85-degree weather. Stretching, he made his way downstairs and grabbed a glass of ice cold lemonade while lingering in the corner of the kitchen, phone in hand. Giving a resigned sigh, he ran a hand through his hair, which already felt too long, and climbed the carpeted steps back up to his room. Before long, he was sat in the old wooden chair before his usually cold metal desk,   
purple laptop open to around 600 tabs, most of which relating to some form of college or space travel studies. A 'modern rock' radio station blared through the red speaker on his desk, adding to the 'teen' aura that surrounded the room, with closed blinds blocking the bright sunlight outside, and the general dark look of the place.

A second song began to overlap the one that was already playing on the radio. The altogether louder chorus of Carry on my Wayward Son led Pete to giggle slightly, swiping to answer the call.

"Hey Mikey, how're you doing?"

"I'm good, thanks." There was a pause, and a yell of 'HOW'S YOUR BOYFRIEND?" from the other end of the call, in the distance.

"SHUT UP GEE!" Mikey called back, "Anyway, um, Gee and I were gonna go kind of back to school shopping in like twenty minutes, i guess, and I just wanted to know if you, like, wanted to come or something?" Pete smiled, glad for the somewhat forced break from school research,

"Yeah, Hudson Mall or...?"

"Uh, yeah, so, I'll see you there at like 12:30ish?" Pete nodded, kicking himself mentally.

"Sorry, yeah! I'll see you then! Bye Mikey!"

"Bye, see you soon."

Pete hung up the phone, smiling and closing his laptop, already making a mental list of the various band merch he needed. He ran down the stairs, sliding across the polished wooden floor in his socks to poke his head through the sliding glass door to the garden, where his aunt sat in a plastic lawn chair.

"Hey, can I go out to the mall with some friends? I'll be back for dinner if you need me to be, promise."

Lifting her sunglasses, Pete's aunt squinted over at him, smiling.

"Course you can, I'm so happy you found friends so quickly here, you're getting so mature so quickly, going off by yourself and all. I'm so proud of you."

Pete laughed awkwardly,

"Thanks. I'll see you later then. Can I take the black car?" His aunt nodded, and Pete grabbed a set of keys off the hook, making his way to the door, a small black backpack with him containing money, his phone, and earbuds. The heat inside the car was almost unbearable, the clip of the seatbelt burning his fingertips, but four open windows brought a cool and much needed draught into the vehicle as he drove to meet Mikey, Gerard, and Frank. The radio blasted throughout the car, the music mostly awful, broken by the sweet release of 'Sober Up,' just as he turned into the complex that held the mall.

Soon enough, Pete found the other three outside Starbucks, after much frantic waving on Frank's part.

"Hey Pete, how you doing?" Gerard asked, as Mikey stood to the side awkwardly.

"Doing good. Hey, we going in here or the mall?" he asked, nodding to the coffee shop beside them. Frank raised an eyebrow at his boyfriend, who smiled cheekily, winning their silent battle, an eye roll from Frank the final sign of defeat.

"Yeah, we're going in here," Mikey said, used to the unspoken arguments between Frank and Gerard.

The air-conditioned store brought relief from the sweltering heat of outside, even if it brought with it the sickly smell of syrups and caramel. It was strangely uncrowded for a Tuesday afternoon in the Summer, the only other customers were two boys sat across from each other at a table, one with red hair and a NASA t shirt, the other with short brown hair, in a black button up shirt. Their fingers were linked together, hands resting on the table as they sipped their coffees. A woman in a suit stood in front of the group in line, looking up from her phone only briefly to order two lattes under the name 'Sharon, with an O.'

Frank ended up ordering for the group, a lengthy order in itself, with Gee standing behind him taking orders from the others. The girl behind the counter, a tired looking teen with Christmas tree green hair and a nametag that read 'Emma' punched in the drinks and printed a receipt, yawning constantly.

The four stood by an empty table, mostly in silence until Pete walked over to the red-haired boy, and who seemed to be his boyfriend,

"Hey, can I just say I like your shirt," he said, nodding towards the NASA logo on the boy's chest. The brown-haired boy giggled as the boy across from him smiled,

"Thanks, it's Pete, right? I heard your friends talking earlier." Pete nodded, smiling, "Anyway, thanks Pete."

"S'no problem, you two have a good day."

"You too, man," the brown-haired boy said, smiling at Pete, who nodded and made his way back to the others, where Frank and Gerard were arguing about something to do with pizza or tacos or something.

"They seem cool," Mikey noted, motioning towards the couple Pete had been talking to.

"Yeah, they are."

The almost nonexistent conversation died out as Pete let his head rest on Mikey's shoulder, standing like that until the name ‘Frank’ was called out, signaling that the drinks were ready.

Not long after, the four were walking through the mall, drinks in hand, looking out for the closest Hot Topic. 

Hand in hand, Gee and Frank walked ahead of the other two, occasionally gesturing towards stores and items with their now empty coffee cups, heads on each-others’ shoulders as they walked.

Pete and Mikey walked behind in silence, shoulders and hands brushing every so often, Pete continuously running a hand through his now almost shoulder length hair.

"On the left!" He called out, spotting the familiar font and vision of a store he had spent far too much time sneaking off to during mall visits with his family, buying men's shirts and hiding them in a pink and purple backpack until he got home.

"Nice one," Frank said, letting go of his boyfriend's hand to rush to the store, stopping and looking up at the walls filled with varying designs of band shirts. "Motherfucking shirts I want are always at the top," he intoned. "Gee?!"

"Coming, Frankie." Gerard came over to where Frank stood on tiptoes, trying to see the designs of the shirts at the very top of the wall. Putting an arm under Frank's, he lifted him up to see the Misfits shirts that he couldn't before.

"Thanks," Frank smiled, sneaking a kiss onto Gerard's cheek as he reached the floor again

Meanwhile, Pete and Mikey wandered around the store together.

"Hey Mikey," Pete smirked, waiting until Mikey turned around to strike a dramatic pose, a pair of glittery rainbow sunglasses perched on his nose.

"It's a look," Mikey laughed, pulling a pair of neon green sunglasses off the stand and exchanging them with his own glasses, wiggling his eyebrows at Pete, who snorted with laughter. Suddenly, he caught a glimpse of something sparkly from the corner of his eye, and raced to get it.

"Here, try... This," he exclaimed, throwing a black and silver feather boa around Mikey's neck and stepping back to admire his work. "Beautiful," he laughed. "C'mon, let's go look at shirts before we end up buying this shit."

The two made their way over to where rows of shirts lay folded. Pete went immediately to the Iron Maiden tees, while Mikey leaned more towards the Black Flag section, running his hands over the different designs until he found one in his size. He looked over to see Pete holding up two different designs of shirt, one with a mummy holding chains in its mouth, the other a gray and black tie-dye shirt with some kind of Freddy Krueger-looking man on the front.

"Which one do you think?"

Mikey looked between the two shirts, not getting a chance to pick before

"Fuck it, I'll get both."

"Cool, to checkout then?"

Pete nodded, and the two made their way to the counter, where Frank and Gerard were already paying.

Ten minutes later, the four were wandering around the various shops of the mall, Mikey and Pete still awkwardly bumping shoulders.

"You know what, fuck this," Pete said, looking up at Mikey and holding out his hand, which the taller boy took, lacing their fingers together and smiling.


	15. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I start this chapter, I just want to put a warning here, this chapter will talk about dysphoria. Also, a huge thanks to 2 of my amazing friends for helping me to write this chapter. Enjoy the story

"Hey Pete?" Mikey called out as the four left what must have been the fifteenth store that they had scoured for anything even mildly humorous or 'emo.' Pete nodded, casting a wary eye to Gerard and Frank walking ahead of them. "I- uh, I got you something. It's nothing special and it's kind of stupid but I thought you would like them."

Mikey held out a small, grey, plastic bag, which Pete took from him and promptly opened, revealing a pair of dark blue socks. He took them from the bag and laughed. The socks had stars dotted around them, connected into constellations, the Planets drifting between them.

"You fucking nerd, I love them," he smiled, letting his head fall onto Mikey's chest as he wrapped his arms around him. Mikey let his chin rest on top of Pete's head, and briefly pulling him into a hug before breaking away, pushing his glasses further up his nose.

After only a while, Frank had somehow ended up on Gerard's back, holding on with one hand while carrying a milkshake in the other.

"Onward, steed."

"Don't call me a fucking steed, that's weird as shit, Frankie," Gerard rolled his eyes and smiled. Frank reached down, letting his boyfriend have some of the milkshake he offered and gaining dirty looks from the surrounding shoppers.

Mikey was distracted from his glaring at the judgmental shoppers by a tap on his arm. He looked over to see Pete pointing at his phone. Mikey raised a quizzical eyebrow until Pete rolled his eyes,

"Check your phone."

"Oh, right," Mikey pulled his phone from his front pocket, clearing the random Instagram notifications and YouTube upload alerts, and opened the single text from Pete.

'I just wantef to know what you wanted to call 'us,' if we are a thing or not, like are we boyfreidns or like dating pr a couple or what'

Ignoring the typos, Mikey smiled and looked over at Pete, whose head was turned to face the floor as he bit his lip, fiddling with the edge of his t-shirt. Grinning, Mikey unlocked his phone and replied quickly,

'If you want to, I'd be fine with calling us boyfriends but only if you're ok with it because I don't want to make you uncomfortahle or anything'

Pete opened his phone at the 'ping' of a new message, and smiled up at Mikey after reading it, a rush of happiness and energy flooding through his chest as he rose onto his tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. 

Mikey let his arm drape over Pete's shoulders as the tattooed boy rested his head on Mikey, and the two walked in a happy silence.

After only a few minutes, a guy who looked around college age, with dirty blond hair and a messy goatee came up and tapped Mikey on the shoulder with a smile,

"Hey, can I just say, you and your girlfriend are real cute together."

Pete looked around hesitantly, a horrid feeling settling in his stomach when he realized there were no girls even close to the two of them.

"I'm- I'm a guy..." he said hesitantly, forcing back the tears that sprung to his eyes, almost doubting his words.

"Ah sorry dude, you just have like a chick's face, y'know? I mean, like the way your hair frames your face and shi-"

"Please leave us alone. I'm sorry," Mikey interrupted the college guy, who raised his hands in defense,

"Damn ok, I was just saying, man."

Mikey turned to Pete, who was staring down at his shoes, his hair shielding his now tear-stained face from view. "Hey, are you ok?'

Pete nodded, and Mikey tried to pull him in closer, but Pete shrugged off Mikey's arm, and stepped away from him.

"I'm gonna go home. I'm tired." he turned away, beginning to walk towards the exit.

"Pete!" Mikey called, but the boy just broke into a run until he reached the back car that awaited him in the car park. He climbed into the front seat, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror above his head. He turned away quickly, shoving the key into the keyhole and turning it angrily, reversing from his spot and blasting the radio loud enough to try and drown out everything. As if the music could wrap him up and get rid of every curve that was just wrong, every long eyelash and feminine feature, every millimeter of his hips that made them just the wrong shape, every inch of his hair that brought him further to what he wasn't.

Getting home was a blur, getting into the upstairs bathroom a forgotten memory of brief 'hello's and running up the stairs.

Now he stood, white knuckles gripping the sink as he suffocated in the sight of himself and the too-hot Summer air. Thousands of thoughts, none of them good, ran through his head at once.

'What if she was right? What if it is just a phase? What if I'm just another stupid teenage girl trying to be different? I'm just a fucking liar with short hair and a binder. If I just offed myself right now then I wouldn't have to live with this, these fucking hips and stupid hair and being such a fucking girl because I'm not.'

"I'm not a FUCKING GIRL!" He screamed at himself, tears streaming down his face as he pounded the mirror with his fists, trying to break his image, the sight of what he was. Attempting to break the mirror was futile, and he ended up with his hands pressing against the smooth glass, his head hanging down, resisting the urge to curl up into a shaking, crying ball and never have to see anyone again, to disappear and have everyone he forgot he ever existed.

The jarring noise of a harsh ringtone forced him to stand up straight and pull his phone from his pocket.

"Fuck OFF!" he yelled, declining Mikey's call and hurling the phone into the empty bath as he let himself slide down the wall until he sat on the ground, staring up at the ceiling, crying until he ran out of tears and brought his shaking knees to his chest. 

Everything felt so bright that it didn't seem real, even his own jeans and skin seemed plastic and fake, like if anyone touched him he would just crumble and leave a black pile of dust.

He pulled at his hair with trembling hands, trying to make everyone and everything go away, to be left alone on a planet with no one else, with no mothers to run away from, no assholes in stores to call him a girl, to make him doubt his entire identity. Just an empty space where no one knew him and he could be alone, where no one cared who he was or what he did ever.

Scrambling to his feet, Pete fumbled his way to the bathroom cabinet, desperate to leave to his planet amongst the stars. Pulling out containers of assorted medication, he stared down at the orange bottles, shuddering uncontrollably at a time he had vowed never to return to. Closing his eyes, he threw down the bottles and began to search the cupboard for another option. He landed on something metal, and brought it down for a better look. An electric razor, the same one his uncle used to cut his hair if he was in a rush.

Hesitant hands plugged the razor into the outlet by the sink, and he undecidedly brought it up to the front of his head. Pete closed his eyes, breathing in deeply, and put down the razor, giving in at the last second. 

Instead, he picked up the pair of hair scissors on the counter, taking a chunk of hair in his fist.

He winced as the scissors severed each strand of hair, leaving a clump of brown in his hand. He made quick work of the rest of his nearly shoulder length hair, until it formed a choppy almost pixie cut.

With another deep breath, he picked up the razor that was still humming, itching to free Pete of what still remained of his long-ish hair. He forced a smile onto his face as he brought the buzzing razor to his head once more, this time running it all the way back to his neck, leaving short bristles where locks had once been. The fake smile soon became real, as Pete shaved away all of the hair that had been growing since the beginning of the summer.

He laughed as he ran his hands over the close-cut brown hair, leaning back against the wall and drawing in a shaky breath.

It wasn't perfect, but it was better.


	16. Chapter 15

Mikey stayed silent for the entire ride home, as Frank and Gerard sang obnoxiously loudly along to the radio. The singing seemed dull, almost blurred out, as Mikey sat in the back of the stifling car. The battery of his phone was considerably lower by the time the three got back to the Ways' house, due to the amount of times he had picked it up to check for texts from Pete, and to half-heartedly lurk in the group chat of internet friends that refused to shut up.

When the car finally stopped, he peeled himself from the hot, sticky, black seats of the Trans Am, and climbed out, hitting his head on the top of the door. After flipping off the doorframe, Mikey rubbed his head and followed the joking Frank and Gerard through the door that never failed to make the most horrible squeaking noise when it was opened.

While Frank went to get sodas from the kitchen, Gee put a hand on Mikey's shoulder, pulling him to the side.

"Hey, did something happen with you and Pete? He just, like, left and you seemed kinda upset I guess." Mikey looked down at the ground, pushing his glasses further up his nose before he lifted his head to look into his brother's concerned brown eyes. He cleared his throat and shook his head,

"Yeah, um, he just felt sick, he said it was probably just the heat though." Mikey ran his hand down the front of his hair, and turned to look at the front door.

Gerard raised a concerned eyebrow, "Ok Mikes. Just... don't be afraid to tell me things, ok?"

Mikey nodded, and was pulled into a quick hug before his brother went to join Frank in the kitchen. After barely catching a poorly thrown can of soda from Frank, he made his way up the carpeted stairs and into his room, occasionally holding the can to his head to cool himself from the Summer heat. As he lay back on his dark blue and black bedsheets, Mikey pulled out his phone and pulled up Pete's contact hesitating momentarily before pressing 'call.'

The phone rang for a few seconds before Pete's voice came over the speaker,

"Hey this is Pete. Sorry I can't get to the phone right now but, uh, I'll call you back when I can... ok, um, bye!"

Mikey couldn't suppress a small smile at the awkward tone of the voice mail, and the small laugh at the end. His face soon fell, however, as he realized that Pete should have been home at least ten minutes ago, and always had notifications turned on with sound.

He rolled over onto his side, the pain of his glasses digging into the side of his nose countered by the relief that the cold sheets against his face brought from the sweltering heat.

Mikey lay in the same position for almost an hour, drifting in and out of a heat induced sleep with blurred dreams that were forgotten seconds after he woke up. Every time he opened his eyes, the internal struggle of 'I should get off my bed but it takes so much less effort to not' took place, each time ending with the same result until Mikey was jolted awake by the buzzing of a phone against his head.

He picked up the phone with bleary eyes to see the emoji-less caller ID of 'Pete' flashing on the screen. He fumbled with the small screen, eventually sliding his thumb across the screen to answer the call.

"Hey, um, hey Mikey. Sorry about, y'know, earlier and not picking up and everything, I was busy I guess," Pete cleared his throat before speaking, his voice cracking halfway through the sentence, for which he mentally cursed himself.

Mikey sat up on his bed and crossed his legs, flattening his hair down on top of his head, "No it's fine, I guess I kind of wanted to just check if you're... ok, I don't know. Yeah."

"I- yes. I am now, thanks for caring. I just wanted to apologize and stuff and yeah, um, sorry I left early at the mall. I was just like not sure about stuff and I didn't- didn't want to, I didn't want to be around any-anyone and it just... There were too many- too many people and too many eyes and it was all just... a lot, I don't know. But yeah, I'm sorry, you didn't do anything wrong and it- it was just that one- that one guy, I'm sorry."

Pete ran his hand over his short hair, the sensation of the short bristles of hair was calming in a way, a reminder of the fact that he was who he said he was, not a 7-year-old in his dad's tie, not a 12-year-old using kitchen scissors to cut waist-length hair to something choppy and messy looking just above his shoulders. He was the pirate he had been at six years old with his best friend, a friend who never stopped calling him 'Pete' from when they were 4 to 14, when he first got a pirate's outfit for his birthday. He lay back on his bed and breathed out slowly, keeping his hand on his head.

"Yeah. I'm sorry about him, he was a dick and you shouldn't- he shouldn't have... I don't know. I'm sorry," Mikey's voice snapped Pete out of his revere, and he shook his head, slowly realizing that Mikey couldn't, in fact, see him over the phone.

"No it's ok, you don't have to be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong, I promise. He was just a dick, you're right." He closed his eyes and slowly opened them again at a call from downstairs. "I have to go, sorry Mikes."

"It's fine, I'll see you at school I guess."

"Ok, love you, bye," Pete's face went bright red the second he hung up the phone. He smashed his face into the pillow from embarrassment. "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, anyone but Mikey.   
Peter you fucking idiot, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

Mikey's face mirrored Pete's, a bright shade of pink from the mindlessly uttered phrase that, even though he knew it meant nothing, made him break his poker face and grin like an idiot for at least a few minutes. He sat on his bed, looking around the framed pictures and torn posters covering his forest and sea green walls, a colour combination he had chosen at 13, and hadn't yet grown tired of.

At Gerard's call of "DINNER!" Mikey made his way to the bathroom, splashing cold water on his face to attempt to stop blushing, and then made his way downstairs, about to turn the corner before he heard a muffled crash and the falling of what he soon realized was Frank sinking to his knees, surrounded by spilled pasta. A muffled thumping revealed Frank banging his head repeatedly against the cupboard.

Gerard sat down next to his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around his shoulders while trying to hold back laughter. Frank let himself fall sideways and be enveloped by Gerard's hug, laughing with tears in his eyes.

"I'm a fucking mess," he gave a watery laugh, resting his forehead on Gee's shoulder.

"I know Frankie, I know."


	17. Chapter 16

Pete stood, leaning against his doorframe as he ran a hand over his newly cut hair. Pulling at the front of his binder through his dark red shirt, he took a deep breath and made his way downstairs.  
The clattering of plates and silverware welcomed him into the dining room, where his uncle was laying out dinner, glasses of water already set out by his aunt. She looked up from her phone briefly to acknowledge that Pete had come downstairs, her head snapping back up again only milliseconds afterwards,

"Pete what the FUCK?" Pete flinched backwards before his aunt stood up and walked over to him. "Turn around, let me see." He did as told, letting his aunt see his brand new haircut, while cringing slightly.

"Please don't be mad," he whispered, ear splitting screams over his last haircut, over a month ago resonating in his head.

"Hmm," his aunt raised an eyebrow, lifting a piece of hair from the back of Pete's neck. "After dinner bring the razor downstairs, you missed a spot in the back. Now come sit down and stop worrying. It looks good."

Pete let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding, a well-needed smile building up as he sat at the table, happiness welling up inside him. The clattering of utensils and quickly melting ice against glasses filled the silence as the three ate.

"How was... whatever you were doing with your friends earlier?" Pete's uncle swallowed the mouthful of spaghetti he had previously been attempting to speak around and looked up at his nephew, who was picking at the last few pieces of pasta on his plate.

Pete looked up from his plate, glancing at the fork he was twirling between his fingers. "Yeah it was... It was good, yeah. We went to Hot Topic and I got some like Iron Maiden shirts and stuff. Gerard and Frank and uh Mikey were there. It was fun!"

His aunt raised an eyebrow, but changed the subject almost as quickly as she shrugged off her suspicion. "Any thoughts on school courses for this year yet?" Pete rushed to swallow his mouthful of food, burning his throat as he did so, yet his eyes lit up when he began to speak.

"Yeah, actually! I wanna do, uh, mechanical and aerospace engineering, I looked it up on the school site and they have a shit ton of courses." Pete waved his hands around animatedly as he spoke, accidentally dropping pasta sauce onto his shoulder as he did so, a glint still in his eye. "I'm also gonna try to take Computer Science and calculus because then I have something to fall back on so I can still get into the internship program at NASA." He leaned back in his seat, taking another forkful of spaghetti.

His uncle nodded, eyebrows slightly raised. He hesitated before speaking, "That's uh, a lot of work, you sure you'll manage it? You're gonna have to take regular classes too, on top of the extra clas-" Pete felt stress build in his stomach as his uncle continued to talk.

"I'll be fine," His voice held more doubt than he wanted to let on, and he ran his hand over his head, the feeling of the short hair calming him. His aunt looked over at his uncle through the corner of her eyes,

"He has a whole 2 weeks to get organized, he'll manage." She directed the second half of her answer to Pete with a nod, "You'll be fine, promise, you got plenty of time."

 

The two weeks of 'organization' became a blur of discussing everything from gender identity to memes with online friends, hours of extra research and prep for NASA Internships, and nights spent awake until 4am or whenever Mikey stopped responding to his texts, always somehow ending up on the 'weird side' of YouTube, blacking out earlier in the night after 5 days of the same fucked up sleep schedule.

~~~

The all-too familiar sound of a phone vibrating against the wooden table next to his head woke Mikey from his quickly forgotten dream. He fumbled for his glasses, then his phone, only to open it to 57 unread messages from the group chat that consisted of him, Pete, Frank, Gerard, and the rarely present Ray.

The conversation seemed to be along the worrying mixed topics of haircuts and... "MIKEY!" He could hear Gerard from his bedroom, all the way at the end of the hall. "You're finally up!" He yelled. Mikey groaned loudly in response, scrolling up through the chat to attempt to make some sense of the situation.

"Are you fucking.... GERARD! YOU BETTER HOPE YOU AREN'T SUGGESTING I CUT MY HAIR." Mikey sat up, blearily shouting through a sleep coated voice to his brother, throwing off the covers and tiredly blundering his way to the door. The cold morning air on his face and arms brought an extreme change from the warmth of the blanket he had been lying underneath. He walked down the hallway to Gerard's room, where he stood, leaning with his head against the door as he heard his brother laughing on the other side. He soon joined him in laughing, until the two of them were sat leaning against either side of the door.

"Mikes, we're kidding," Gee chuckled, after the laughter had died down. His voice was muffled through the wooden door but Mikey could still hear the smirk in his voice.

"Gerard open the fucking door before I kick it down, you piece of lying trash."

At he requested opening of the door, Mikey was greeted by a grinning, black-haired Gerard, who bowed mockingly as his brother entered the room and sat down on his rarely-made bed. Mikey looked around the room that seemed to have some other thing in it every other week, whether it was a skull candle, band poster, or in today's case, a new drawing. He sighed, moved backwards, and crossed his awkwardly long legs.

"Ok. If you were joking then why are you and Frank discussing the health of my current hair, and why have you sent three... four pictures of hairstyles with the caption 'Maybes for Mikey(s)'?" 

Gee laughed, mirroring Mikey's movements. "Look, your hair is not fuckin healthy, and they would look good on you!" he shifted to face   
Mikey, "Pete cut his, why won't you?"

Mikey raised an eyebrow slowly, "Just because Pete did something and it looked amazing, doesn't mean it'll look good on me too."

Gerard pulled up another picture on his phone, "Mikeeeyyyy come on, that second one I sent would look so good on you. I'll even cut mine at the same time if you want."

Mikey shook his head, "Gee, my hair is like... 4 inches long now, and that cut wouldn't even work, there's no way it could defy gravity like, look." he pointed at the second picture set sent by Frank. "It's just fuckin... tall."

Gerard just stared at his brother "You'd be a shit lawyer, Mikes." He stood up, then quickly walked out from his room, turning back to face Mikey as he did so. "And you are getting your hair cut tomorrow Mikes. Ever since you tried to bleach it, it's been dead as shit."

"Fine. And only because of that. And even then, I'm choosing the hairstyle." Gerard kept walking away, nodding sarcastically.

"Okay Mikes, don't forget school starts Tuesday!" The enthusiasm in his voice was as forced as the smile on his face.

Mikey groaned, "Shit."

**Author's Note:**

> Hello to whoever has decided to take the time to read this! This will be a fic which includes both Petekey and some Frerard, and possibly other ships if they find their way into the story. I have no schedule for updates, so you could get none for 2 weeks, and then 6 in one day, so I'm apologizing in advance. I hope you enjoy my first published full-length fic!


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